Make no mistake, a nursing home is a tough place to be. Most of us do not plan to be here. It may never even enter our minds. I was wondering if we would have to put my mother in a home. But I surely did not figure I would be in one.
I've had very little experience with death and dying. Ours was not a close-knit family therefore we did not see the natural progression of life through the aging process to the inevitability of death. .Grieving was limited to the loss of friendships and the parting of my beloved grandparents after summer vacation. As a military family, we moved often and without warning thanks to parents who thought it easier to spring the upheavals upon us. I came to believe that all connections to people were temporary and short term.
As a result, I was ill-prepared to deal with death as an adult. Nor was I much good at building long-term relationships. At the nursing home, there is much death to deal with. In my eight months here, I have lost many acquaintances I have made quick connections with. Mr. Kendall, who shared three meals a day with me at the same table and even flirted with me despite his 80 years. Ms. Lorna Ford, a former nurse and Harley Davidson rider, who proved to me that it's never too late for love by Sharing her own story of love and marriage in the nursing home. Thomas Goff, who gave me a wonderful compliment one late night when his calls for help went unanswered. Sherill, the 103-year-old who I enjoyed calling "Cutie" because of the way his face lit up with his jack-o-lantern smile. Most recently, a woman my own age died suddenly and unexpectedly. Michelle Manning was happily discharged to go home. Two days later, she hides her car in the back lot of the nursing home and takes a seat like she still lives here. When she is discovered she is checked out and goes out in an ambulance. We never see Miss Michelle again. It's hard to lose these people who become friends. Evidence of our mortality is unnaturally in our face every day.
I've had very little experience with death and dying. Ours was not a close-knit family therefore we did not see the natural progression of life through the aging process to the inevitability of death. .Grieving was limited to the loss of friendships and the parting of my beloved grandparents after summer vacation. As a military family, we moved often and without warning thanks to parents who thought it easier to spring the upheavals upon us. I came to believe that all connections to people were temporary and short term.
As a result, I was ill-prepared to deal with death as an adult. Nor was I much good at building long-term relationships. At the nursing home, there is much death to deal with. In my eight months here, I have lost many acquaintances I have made quick connections with. Mr. Kendall, who shared three meals a day with me at the same table and even flirted with me despite his 80 years. Ms. Lorna Ford, a former nurse and Harley Davidson rider, who proved to me that it's never too late for love by Sharing her own story of love and marriage in the nursing home. Thomas Goff, who gave me a wonderful compliment one late night when his calls for help went unanswered. Sherill, the 103-year-old who I enjoyed calling "Cutie" because of the way his face lit up with his jack-o-lantern smile. Most recently, a woman my own age died suddenly and unexpectedly. Michelle Manning was happily discharged to go home. Two days later, she hides her car in the back lot of the nursing home and takes a seat like she still lives here. When she is discovered she is checked out and goes out in an ambulance. We never see Miss Michelle again. It's hard to lose these people who become friends. Evidence of our mortality is unnaturally in our face every day.
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